Lives Well Lived

None of us can skip communication in our daily lives. Whether at work or at home, we talk with others in the hope of getting our needs met and sharing a connection. Some people are natural and open communicators while others need some help along the way. Here are some suggestions to ease the way and help everyone get along a little bit better. Assume Positive Intentions – when talking with family, friends or coworkers, try to avoid becoming immediately defensive. Believe the other party is working to improve the situation and striving for a positive outcome. Although it can be hard, try to be receptive to the idea someone is trying to convey even if they don’t go about it in the best way. Be Clear and Concise – take a moment to prepare your thoughts before speaking or responding. For clarity, limit yourself to dealing with one individual topic at a time. Also, using too many words or fancy language can distract from your intended message and the listener may stop listening. Use Active Listening Skills - which means you listen to understand what is being said and not in order to respond. Paraphrase back to the speaker what you thought they said to make sure you understand before you form your response. Ask open ended questions, not yes or no questions. Watch Nonverbal Communication – these include facial expression, gestures and tone of voice. Be aware of the message you’re sending, such as crossed arms which convey defensiveness or lack of openness. Don’t look at your watch or phone which conveys impatience or the desire to be elsewhere. Use a calm reassuring tone of voice, even when emotions are running high. Email and Texts are Tricky: Use Caution – as these have no tone of voice, they are easier to misconstrue. Whenever possible speak to someone in person or by phone. Written messages are one of the most important times to assume the best intentions of the other party.